Finding Our Way Home: Love, Resiliency, and Becoming the Refuge

This week marks the last of three weeks exploring the familiar stories of Luke 15. If you’ve been loving them—great, you get one more! And if you’ve been ready to move on—don’t worry, we will soon.

We began this series looking at these texts as stories of return, of being found, and of coming home. They are stories that remind us we can always return because of what God is like. When Jesus speaks to these themes, he answers every question—even the ones he wasn’t explicitly asked—with love. It is the kind of love shown by the father who embraced his prodigal son and threw him a celebration.

These passages also remind us we can always come home because of who we are. You are beloved, valued, and deeply known by a God who will drop everything and search everywhere when (not if) you get lost.

Simply because of love.

The Power of Practice and Resiliency

I was inspired to start this series not only by those reminders of who God is and who we are, but also by a lesson from one of my seminary professors. He emphasized the vital practice of consistently reminding one another of these truths and putting them into daily action.

It shows up in our weekly invitation each Sunday to "Make Yourself at Home"—to get to know others and to be known ourselves. There is profound communal value in repeatedly affirming each person's worth and belovedness. We need to be reminded time and again that our job title, our income, where we live, or what we produce do not define us.

We are defined first, foremost, and exclusively by Love. We are loved, and we are loved to love. That is what truly matters.

Over time, these repeated affirmations build a deep source of spiritual and mental resiliency within us and across our community. It is the kind of resilience that carries us through life’s difficulties and extraordinary seasons—reminding us that when our burdens feel too heavy, we can lean on one another.

Seeing and Being Seen: Thurman & Nouwen

Two weeks ago, I introduced theologian Howard Thurman and his writings on our deep human need to be regarded and to cultivate a sense of regard for others. Writing in the 1940s, Thurman was already touching on concepts foundational to modern trauma studies: having a firm sense of self-worth, and having that worth affirmed by others, offers vital psychological and spiritual protection.

As we continue with Luke 15, I’ve also drawn inspiration from Henri Nouwen, a Dutch Roman Catholic priest and influential spiritual author. Two of his works stand out in particular: The Wounded Healer and The Return of the Prodigal Son—a collection of reflections sparked by Rembrandt’s famous painting of the father welcoming his son home.

After Nouwen’s death in 1996, it became known through biographers and his personal journals that he struggled privately with his identity and sexual orientation throughout his adult life while maintaining his vows. Knowing this context adds even deeper resonance to his writing. In The Return of the Prodigal Son, Nouwen writes openly about his own feelings of lostness and self-doubt, observing that one of the greatest traps we face in life is self-rejection.

The Heart of God

Even when we struggle with self-rejection, we find comfort in discovering God’s heart toward us. The parables of the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the prodigal son reveal a God whose default stance is unconditional love.

Nouwen writes:

"The great mystery of our faith [is that] we do not choose God, God chooses us. From all eternity we are hidden 'in the shadow of God’s hand' and 'engraved on his palm.'"

God’s love comes first, and it comes without conditions.

Remember the context of Luke 15: Jesus tells these stories because critics question him for eating with the "wrong" kind of people—those deemed lost or cast out by society. Jesus responds by showing that whenever a beloved child becomes lost, God takes the initiative to seek, find, and welcome them home with overwhelming joy.

These parables transform our understanding of the spiritual journey. God does not hide from us or make it difficult to return. When we wander or hide, God actively searches, yearning to embrace us in love once more.

Making that mental shift can be hard. The Psalmist frequently cries out, "Why do you hide from me?" (Psalms 10, 13, 27, 88). But Jesus shows us that God isn't hiding from us—often, we simply aren't ready to be found.

Becoming Like God

Allowing ourselves to be found—refusing to hide from ourselves through self-rejection, from our loved ones, or from God—is a difficult step. Yet coming home is not the final step of the journey.

When we pay close attention to these stories, we realize who stands at the center, and who Jesus ultimately calls us to emulate.

It is easy—and at times necessary—to identify with the wandering son, the lost sheep, or the coin in the dark corner. But what about the one who searches? Can we see ourselves as the one who seeks out the lost, calls out into the dark, waits patiently at the edge of the driveway, and throws a party to celebrate reconciliation?

Are we willing to become that kind of presence for others?

Reconciliation and forgiveness are essential parts of our story. But as Nouwen points out, if our spiritual life consists only of repeatedly wandering away and waiting to be forgiven, it becomes a kind of sentimentalism rather than the gospel message.

As Paul reminds us, we are heirs and successors in faith (Romans 8:17). Nouwen writes that as God’s image grows within us, we are no longer called merely to return home as the younger or elder son, but to be the home where other wayward children can return and find welcome.

This is the work of God’s grace in our lives: perfecting us in love so completely that we become a place of refuge for anyone seeking their way back.

Make Yourself at Home

So hear this affirmation every time we gather—whether inside our building or out in the world: You are beloved, valued, and cherished. You are worthy of celebration, and you are joyfully welcomed here.

Hear the invitation: Make yourself at home.

Whatever you need in order to return to Love, may you find it here. As God’s beloved children and heirs, embody that invitation. Let it settle deep into your soul and your bones so that once you have come home, you can be home for others.

It may be the truest expression of our faith when anyone who walks through our doors feeling lost is able to make themselves at home. Even if you don't feel ready to be the one searching or welcoming yet, know that simply belonging and showing up authentically sets the pattern. You help make this community a place where everyone can feel at home:

At home with ourselves.

At home with each other.

At home in Love.